I Must Understand

I must understand that I can’t turn shit into gold.

Some nice women, and even a few half-courtesans, turned to me and asked if I could help them to operate at a higher level.

The trouble was, with many of them, that I couldn’t even begin to teach them, as their life fell apart before the start of our “course”.

I could not get around to teaching techniques with these women, because of something they have deep inside them – let me call this “the sub-conscious self-assessment” – did not let them to do it.

In case of these women, something crystallized, which, unfortunately, is built deep in most women: you don’t deserve to be treated well by life, you are not worthy of respect, abundance and love.

That’s sad.

It’s even more sad, as far as I noticed, that they all give something of great value and beautiful to men, from their selves.

Because they feel, live and have an emanation.

The arisen sexual energy is dangerous. In my opinion the matter with cheap sex is that it does nothing but stirs things up that are already bleeding anyway.

It upsets starvelings and makes them eager, demanding and aggressive. Volition and the harshness of taking away come in the picture.

I think there’s nothing wrong with someone hungry, neither if they come to me hungry.

But I’m cautious. I don’t cast pearls before swine.

Tourists could not always go into churches; even believers had to wait in the lobby area, the so-called narthex, back in the old days, until they got admission to the sacred space.

You can’t walk in the sacred space with a dirty sole, or while being hungry and filthy, whether you’re rich or poor.

I always tell about this and make it clear.

First of all, I clear their mind.

Why did they come to me? What are they looking for? I’ll not meet those who bluster, are vulgar or silly.

If they have some recognition of their purpose in life and I can connect to that, I have an idea, and they move the urge to help and connect inside me, I continue teaching them.

After their mind comes their soul. Am I able to reach their soul? As everyone has a Soul… The question is how deep it is hidden inside them.

I don’t except them to remove their armor in the first half hour of our meeting, and lay their bare soul before me.

I talk to them from my soul, with my candor flowing from my soul.

It surprises them, as it is pretty unusual.

But candor is inspiring; moreover it is one of the best aphrodisiacs.

“Desire begins in the mind” – as it is said in the film called Dangerous Beauty. I suppose so, followed by the next stages that are Soul and Heart.

Candor bares you and liberates you. The soul wants to fly and wing the air; they will risk everything for that…

They move with me.

Now we can get started.

The Soul is undressing. I am touching their back and the history of Souls reveals.

When they turn round, their Heart is also ready for healing.

When their chest opens, I can almost hear their Heat throbbing violently. They are scared and shaking, but they also want to be loved and touched.


I am reminded of this photo. It is Hermes with spurred ankles and the caduceus, a staff entwined by two serpents and surmounted by wings in his hand.

Hermes is raising his right arm, pointing upwards and straight before him.

As if to say: Dear friends, keep moving forwards and every time raise your arm higher!

Please, do not descend!

Be your standard Pleasure itself!

(Caduceus: According to Hindu Yoga, Ida, Pingala and Sushumna are the names of nadis [energy channels] that run on the right and left side of the body, and from the bottom of the spine to the imagined third eye, in which the forces of the great Kundalini god move. In this representation, one of the serpents is black and indicates the female, dynamic and lunar energies pervading the whole world, while the other one is white and represents the male, static and solar energies. Their entwining creates the common path, which is the flash road of descending divine energies.)


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